According to the tenets of the old believers, the choice of a wife is based not on superficial qualities or random attraction but, above all, on the testing of spiritual and moral virtues.

Traditional Values in Bride Selection

According to the tenets of the old believers, the choice of a wife is based not on superficial qualities or random attraction but, above all, on the testing of spiritual and moral virtues. Great emphasis is placed on upbringing and family traditions, as it was believed that many qualities of the bride were inherited from her mother. For example, one piece of advice states:

"How to choose a bride. You ask for my sinful counsel and blessing to enter into a legitimate marriage with the bride you have chosen. If you are healthy and she is healthy, if you like each other and the bride is of reliable character, and her mother has a good, unflappable nature, then you may marry her." (source: link txt)

Particular importance is given to the bride's humility and inner piety, since "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree." Thus, the following advice is provided:

"And in order for her to be humble, then look: If the bride’s mother is humble, so too should the bride be..." (source: link txt)

This approach also emphasizes that the choice of a spouse should be guided not by external attributes, but by her inclination towards spiritual good:

"And a spouse should be chosen not because she plays the guitar well, or is very cheerful, or carefree, or simply because you want to get married, but based on completely different criteria. If we choose based on external qualities, all we get is the external – but one should choose based on Christian virtues. In a person, even a young one, his inclinations are always visible: whether he has an inclination towards goodness, whether he loves prayer, the house of God, whether he desires to do God’s will, whether he is obedient to his parents, and what his relationships with his close ones are like..." (source: link txt)

Thus, according to the old believers’ tenets, the proper choice of a wife entails:

1. Assessing the health and reliability of the bride's character.
2. Considering family traditions, where the mother's humility and virtue serve as a model for the daughter.
3. Evaluating the inner tendency toward spiritual growth and the ability to live according to Christian virtues rather than external or material criteria.
4. Involving spiritual reflection and, if necessary, seeking the counsel of relatives and authoritative figures who are familiar with the traditions and can help make the right choice.

This system of choosing a wife reflects the old believers’ deep commitment to spiritual ideals and family tradition continuity, standing in opposition to randomness and a superficial approach to marital unions.