The Art of Delegated Decision Making

Choice is not just an automatic act, but a dynamic process that unites discussion, decision-making, and genuine desire. At times, personal motivation may be lacking, but that does not justify a complete abdication of responsibility. On the contrary, especially in such cases, bringing in someone capable of injecting fresh energy and a critically considered opinion into the conversation becomes the key to maintaining control over the process.

Collaboration in decision-making allows you to delegate only part of the task without losing full influence over the final outcome. Even if the emotional charge is temporarily missing, a well-reasoned discussion and a measured decision can make up for the absent components of the process. Such an approach, demonstrating a balance between independence and support, opens up new opportunities for a meaningful and confident choice.

Thus, prudent delegation becomes an art that enables the combination of personal involvement with purposeful support. It is not a renunciation of responsibility but a skillful distribution of roles in the pursuit of the best decision—a decision always rooted in discussion, determination, and a sincere desire to make the right choice.

How can you delegate the choice if you yourself lack the desire or motivation to make a decision?

The main idea is that choice is not merely a mechanical act but a complex consisting of discussion, decision, and desire. If personal motivation is absent, it does not mean you can simply shed all responsibility; rather, it implies finding a way to compensate for the missing element by involving another person who will participate in the discussion and make a well-reasoned decision.

As noted in one source, "choice is something mixed of discussion, decision, and desire, and it is exactly neither desire by itself, nor decision, nor mere discussion, but something composed (complex) of all this. [...] Choice is the preference of one over the Other; but no one would prefer something without thinking it through, and choose without deliberation" (source: link ). This implies that if you feel a deficit in desire or motivation, you can delegate part of the process—such as active discussion and reasoned decision-making—to someone with the necessary internal energy and willingness to engage in the conversation.

At the same time, it is important that delegation does not turn into a complete relinquishment of participation in forming the choice. As described in another text, where, in the process of positive upbringing, parents remain the primary decision-makers without rigidly enforcing their point of view, delegating choice means retaining control over the final outcome even when transferring part of the responsibility to another person (source: link ). In other words, it is crucial to find a balance between active participation in discussion and using someone else’s input or energy to form a considered result.

Thus, delegating the choice when personal motivation is lacking is possible if you structure the process to ensure a reasoned discussion and collaborative decision-making with the person to whom you delegate part of the responsibility. This approach will help maintain the quality of the decision despite a temporary shortfall in your own desire or motivation.

Supporting citation(s):
"Thus, what is not choice has been said; now let us say what it is. It is something mixed of discussion, decision, and desire, and it is exactly neither desire by itself, nor decision, nor mere discussion, but something composed (complex) of all this. [...] Choice is the preference of one over the Other; but no one would prefer something without thinking it through, and choose without deliberation" (source: link ).

"Practicing positive upbringing, you attentively listen to the resisting child and then decide on the best course of action. [...] The parents are the main ones, but they are not obliged to always rigidly insist on their request or viewpoint." (source: link ).