The Pursuit of an Unattainable Ideal

In today's world, chasing the ideal can turn every moment of life into a tense internal struggle, depriving us of true tranquility. At the heart of this problem lies the relentless desire to possess absolute perfection, which makes even our best achievements seem inadequate. This perspective not only distorts our understanding of the present but also pushes us into a constant, self-critical comparison with an unreachable ideal.

The main source of this inner conflict is the difference between natural development and excessive self-admiration. The former is about recognizing one’s own limitations and striving for growth through honest self-improvement—understanding that our shortcomings are not grounds for condemnation but a starting point for development. In contrast, a narcissistic pursuit of perfection creates a destructive effect, transforming the quest for a divine ideal into a source of incessant inner tension and suffering, forcing a person to try to be more than they truly are.

In conclusion, the unbridled pursuit of the ideal robs us of the joy found in the present, making us forget that life is defined by its imperfections. By freeing ourselves from the need to constantly compare ourselves to an unattainable ideal, we can value every moment and embrace our true nature, welcoming genuine harmony into our lives.

Why can the pursuit of perfection hinder satisfaction with the present, even when everything seems fine?

The pursuit of perfection can disturb the peace of the present because it upends our perception of life: even if everything appears normal, a person’s focus remains fixed on an unattainable ideal that constantly reminds them of their limitations. As stated in source link , “In the pursuit of perfection, the attitude toward nature manifests itself: natural development is given a specific direction, setting a goal to achieve perfection. Is such a freely personal aspiration good? While perfection in itself may be desirable, is a person’s desire to possess it personally truly good? We find the unshakeable basis for a negative answer in the biblical account which asserts that the first and greatest sin of humanity was the desire to be like gods, knowing good and evil—that is, the desire to possess divine perfection personally. This desire is evil because it is the aspiration to take the place of God, to be the center of existence, self-satisfied” (source: link ).

Another important aspect is the distinction between the natural drive to improve and the narcissistic drive for perfection. The same source highlights, “We have previously noted that one can distinguish between the pursuit of perfection and the pursuit of improvement—the former being acquired and the latter innate. The pursuit of improvement, or natural and necessary development, compels a person to recognize their inherent limitations; whereas the pursuit of perfection—the narcissistic desire for personal, self-satisfied possession of absolute perfection, the wish ‘to be like God’—leads to evil: delusion, moral degradation, and ugliness. ... Yet, one cannot extinguish the pursuit of improvement within oneself, which gives experiential knowledge of one’s natural limitations and inherent evil—one cannot eliminate the suffering associated with that realization” (source: link ).

Thus, when a person fixates on an unattainable ideal, even positive states are seen as insufficient. The constant striving for absolute perfection sharpens the feeling of inner inadequacy, as the ideal is inherently unreachable. This results in continuous inner tension and suffering, even when the conditions for life are objectively sufficient. It is precisely this relentless comparison of the present with the ideal that prevents a person from fully enjoying what they have, leaving them in perpetual pursuit and internal conflict.