Embracing Fear: A Pathway to Inner Freedom
In today's world, understanding and accepting fear becomes a crucial step toward inner freedom and overcoming shame. The journey begins by acknowledging that fear is a natural reaction of our soul—a signal of freedom and inevitable change. Recognizing the nature of this emotion and distinguishing its various forms—from the specific to the profound, nameless one—helps us view the problem from a fresh perspective and prepare for proactive action. It is important to realize that behind an apparent readiness for change, unconscious resistance often lurks, its roots hidden in habitual thought patterns. This resistance is the common denominator of both fear and shame, highlighting the necessity of self-work. Creating a safe and comfortable space, especially during the initial session with a psychologist, plays a decisive role in the therapeutic process. In an atmosphere of support and mutual understanding, one can dispel anxiety and take that essential first step toward change. Embracing your fears, analyzing them in detail, and being willing to work on internal barriers open the door to a new, more harmonious life where every step is a journey toward self-discovery.
What steps can be taken to overcome fear and shame when seeking help from a psychologist?
To start, it is essential to note that overcoming fear and shame involves understanding their nature and working through internal barriers. For instance, one source outlines the initial steps on the path to solving the problem:
"The first step in overcoming the fear of turning to a psychologist is understanding that this fear is a natural sense of freedom that must be acknowledged, not evaded in everyday life. It is no coincidence that Kierkegaard defined fear as the 'dizziness of freedom,' and it is no accident that Kirillov in Dostoevsky’s 'The Possessed' sees fear as the main dominator of human existence. The second step is to differentiate between ordinary fear (Furcht) and primordial fear (Angst), which Heidegger describes as lacking a definite object. Once these two steps are understood, one can move on to actions aimed at specifically overcoming the fear of consulting a psychologist."
(source: 201_1000.txt)
This means that an important step is to accept that the feeling of fear is natural. Understanding its roots helps us see the problem from another angle and prepare ourselves for change.
It is also worth noting that very often, behind an outward willingness to change, there is unconscious resistance, which manifests not only as fear but also as a sense of shame. This is explained in the following excerpt:
"People usually turn to a psychologist when the need arises to rethink, reassess, or change something—in their life, in relationships with a spouse, friends, colleagues, parents, children. But although, on a conscious level, a person wishes to change, on an unconscious level, he very often resists attempts to alter his established attitudes and break habitual behavior patterns. This resistance is at the root of both fear and shame, and overcoming it is crucial for successful therapy."
(source: 473_2360.txt)
Thus, recognizing and accepting internal resistance is a vital step. This acceptance helps one refrain from judging oneself for experiencing fear or shame, instead viewing them as signals that it is time to work on changing ingrained psychological patterns.
Equally important is the understanding that fear can take on various forms. As noted:
"Generally speaking, fear is a many-headed hydra—the objects of fear are infinitely diverse. Moreover, fear can be triggered by opposites. For example, in addition to the fear of death, there is the fear of life—the fear of living; alongside the fear of slavery, there is the fear of freedom; and besides the fear of 'others,' there is also the fear of 'oneself.' Recognizing this diverse nature of fear helps us understand that it can be directed at completely opposite and unexpected objects, which is an important step toward overcoming it."
(source: 201_1000.txt)
Recognizing the multifaceted nature of fear allows us to approach its analysis more flexibly and select methods that suit our specific experiences.
Moreover, creating a comfortable and safe space when communicating with a psychologist is significant. As described in another text, even during the first interview, specialists pay attention not only to the conversation's content but also to details like the setting and layout, which help reduce tension and assist the client in overcoming the initial barrier before the visit:
"Today in Russian culture, one can observe not only a return of people to churches, but also the emergence of structures providing psychological support and assistance, where a person, lost in a sense of divine abandonment, can receive attention, conversation, and empathy, and be offered help in restoring the harmonious integrity of their triad: body-soul-spirit. The specifics of a consulting psychologist’s work include several stages. The first and most essential stage is the interview. It is here that the psychologist intends to address several crucial tasks, namely: organizing a comfortable space for both the client and the therapist, for without this, the success of the consultation is called into question..."
(source: 1292_6456.txt)
Thus, several practical steps can be outlined:
1. Accept and acknowledge the presence of fear as a natural reaction, without trying to immediately reject it.
2. Differentiate between types of fear, distinguishing between those arising from immediate experiences and those that are deep-seated and nameless.
3. Understand that internal resistance to change is the root of both shame and fear, and work on recognizing this resistance.
4. Choose a psychologist or psychotherapist who creates the safest and most comfortable conditions for the first meeting to reduce anxiety.
5. Do not be afraid to seek support, as professional help not only clarifies your feelings but also teaches you how to manage them.
Supporting citation(s):
"Первый шаг на пути преодоления страха перед обращением к психологу – это понимание, что этот страх является естественным ощущением свободы и его нужно осознать, а не убегать от него в повседневность. Недаром и Киркегор определял страх как «головокружение свободы», и недаром Кириллов в «Бесах» Достоевского видит в страхе главную доминанту человеческого бытия. Второй шаг – это разграничение обычного страха (Furcht) от первородного страха (Angst), который Хайдеггер описывает как не имеющий определенного предмета. Осознав эти два шага, можно переходить к действиям, направленным на конкретное преодоление страха перед психологом."
(source: 201_1000.txt)
"К психологу обычно обращаются, когда назрела необходимость что-то переосмыслить, переоценить, изменить — в своей жизни, в отношениях с супругом, друзьями, сослуживцами, родителями, детьми. Но хотя на уровне сознания человек хочет измениться, на бессознательном уровне он очень часто сопротивляется попыткам поменять его установки, сломать привычные стереотипы поведения. Это сопротивление является корневым как для страха, так и для стыда, и преодоление его важно для успеха терапии."
(source: 473_2360.txt)
"Вообще говоря, страх есть многоголовая гидра – предметы его бесконечно разнообразны. Мало того, страх может возбуждаться противоположными предметами. Так, помимо страха смерти, существует и страх жизни – страх перед жизнью; помимо страха перед рабством, существует страх свободы; помимо страха перед «другими», существует и страх перед «собой». Осознание этой разнообразной природы страха помогает понять, что он может быть направлен на вполне противоположные и неожиданные предметы, что является важным шагом к его преодолению."
(source: 201_1000.txt)
"Сегодня в российской культуре заметно не только возвращение людей в храмы, но и появление структур психологической поддержки и помощи, где потерянный в своей богооставленности человек, может получить внимание, общение, сопереживание, где ему предложат помощь в восстановлении гармоничной целостности его тримерии: тело-душа-дух. Специфика работы консультирующего психолога включает несколько этапов. Первым и основным из этих этапов является интервью. Именно здесь психолог рассчитывает решить несколько важных задач... организовать комфортное пространство для клиента и для себя, ибо без этого успех консультации ставится под сомнение."
(source: 1292_6456.txt)
Thus, a consistent and conscious approach, emphasizing self-awareness and the creation of a secure space for dialogue, can help overcome fear and shame when seeking psychological help.