The Inner Conflict: When Ideals Clash with Reality

Each of us dreams of a world where the ideals of selflessness and mutual love become a reality, forming a unified whole of the individual. But when our beliefs in unconditional love are not reflected in the actions of those around us or in our own experiences, an intense internal conflict begins to emerge. This gap between high ideals and harsh reality creates a void where mutual giving is lacking, provoking a sense of inner incompleteness.

Such a discrepancy leads a person to perceive the absence of reciprocity as a personal failure, and painful emotions gradually turn into negativity, even to the point of hatred. True self-affirmation is possible only through a living, mutual exchange—where every moment of an individual interacts with others, confirming reciprocity. When this connection is missing, our inner yearnings remain unfulfilled, causing us to experience not only disappointment but also deep internal pain.

Ultimately, the search for genuine love and mutual understanding becomes a challenging task when reality does not meet our high expectations. This challenge requires not only a reassessment of personal beliefs but also the exploration of new ways to interact with the world where everyone can feel heard and appreciated. Thus, the internal conflict between our own ideals and the imperfections of the external world becomes a powerful catalyst for personal growth and the re-evaluation of values.

How can the internal discrepancy between beliefs and actions evoke negative emotions, such as hatred?

When a person firmly believes that true personal unity should be expressed through unconditional selflessness and mutual love, yet their actions or the reactions of the world do not align with these convictions, a deep internal disharmony arises. This mismatch between ideals and reality provokes a feeling of inadequacy—a kind of inner void where even love proves insufficient. In such a situation, the individual may begin to perceive the lack of mutual exchange as a failure of their values, giving rise to a painful sensation that eventually turns into negative emotions, such as hatred.

As explained in one of the sources, hatred arises precisely as a deficiency of love: "Hatred is a deficiency of love. Indeed, love manifests in the symphonic personality as the mutual exchange of its moments. But a moment gives itself not to emptiness, but to other moments, and not in vain, but for their sake: in order to affirm them. Therefore, if my affirmation encounters an impediment, it is because the other moments of the world do not wish to give themselves to me sufficiently and do not give enough. My affirmation runs into their inertia, just as their affirmation meets mine." (source: link )

Thus, when internal beliefs demand complete giving and unity, yet actions—whether one’s own or those of others—fail to meet these high ideals, a conflict arises that is experienced as painful rejection and negativity. The individual begins to feel that their true values are not echoed in the world, and this internal discord can provoke negative emotions, all the way to hatred.