Social isolation is not merely the absence of company but a complex phenomenon often rooted in our life experiences.

The Roots of Solitude: Understanding the Causes of Social Isolation

Social isolation is not merely the absence of company but a complex phenomenon often rooted in our life experiences. From early childhood, our approaches to communication are formed, and if we fail to establish trusting bonds with others in our formative years, it can greatly affect our ability to make friends later on.

The development of interpersonal relationships is also influenced by inherent personality traits, which are especially noticeable during adolescence—a time when an individual is so absorbed in their own feelings that establishing meaningful contacts becomes a significant challenge. During this period, the lack of close communication may be perceived as a true tragedy, further intensifying feelings of withdrawal and loneliness. External circumstances, such as the loss of loved ones or difficult economic conditions, can further complicate matters. The loss of significant people and life hardships create a sense of emptiness that makes a person feel vulnerable and incapable of forming new relationships. Conversely, tough situations can sometimes prompt a search for solace in interactions that ease the acute pain of lacking support.

Ultimately, the absence of healthy social interactions deprives us of a part of our “self,” leaving us disconnected from a full comprehension of life. Acknowledging all these contributing factors is the first step toward restoring social bonds and attaining a new inner balance. Such reflection offers hope and energy to pursue mutual understanding and support, which are essential for a fulfilling life and self-realization.

How do we explain the causes of social isolation when a person lacks a circle of friends?

Social isolation and the lack of a circle of friends can have numerous complex causes, and the materials presented shed light on these factors from various perspectives.

Firstly, early experiences in communication play an important role. If a person did not have the opportunity to form strong, trusting bonds with peers and the surrounding world during childhood, they may later lack the skills to build friendly relationships. For example, Florovsky noted that he never felt a part of childhood or youth society:
"Florovsky attributed his loneliness to the fact that 'he was never a child nor a young person, did not know comrades, acquaintances, society, life, or nature.'" (source: link txt)

Secondly, an important factor is the self-centeredness and focus on personal feelings typical of adolescence. At this phase, an individual may be so preoccupied with themselves that normal communication with others becomes challenging. This leads to a situation where the absence of interaction is felt as a tragedy, causing the adolescent to retreat even further:
"In adolescence, a person often turns out to be unable to engage in normal communication due to being excessively focused on oneself. But the absence of such communication is traumatic, perceived as a tragedy, and causes the adolescent to become even more withdrawn." (source: link txt)

and

"In the period when a person's identity and worldview are forming, the young individual experiences an acute need to comprehend the changes occurring within, which results in self-isolation." (source: link txt)

In addition to personal traits, external life circumstances also contribute to social isolation. The loss of close individuals leaves an enormous void, making it difficult to seek support and form new friendly relationships:
"Personal orphanhood. I already mentioned that one of the immediate problems faced by someone who has lost a loved one is the feeling, the sensation of loneliness, of being abandoned by, at times, the only person who mattered to us, who filled all our space, time, and heart." (source: link txt)

Furthermore, economic hardships, such as living in poverty, can influence an individual’s social activity. In such cases, a person may feel particularly vulnerable and withdraw from society, although sometimes this very hardship provokes a desire to find interaction that can alleviate the pain of loneliness:
"Stripped to poverty, I felt loneliness much more acutely. Hunger makes the time of communication easier and moves the soul towards openness." (source: link txt)

Finally, the absence of normal communication is perceived as a loss of one’s identity, because, according to one of the authors, a person separated from others loses the sense of self and the fullness of life:
"Loneliness is the beginning of death, therefore one must always strive to communicate with other people. A person separated from others is not an individual but merely an 'individuum.' He does not find himself. He must seek himself not only in God but also in his neighbor. I will never find myself by separating from others." (source: link txt)

Thus, the lack of a circle of friends and social isolation may result from a combination of factors: insufficient communication experience during early childhood, the egocentric focus typical of adolescence, the loss of loved ones, as well as economic and life hardships. These circumstances gradually lead a person to withdraw into themselves, experiencing deep loneliness and alienation.

Supporting citation(s):
"Florovsky attributed his loneliness to the fact that 'he was never a child nor a young person, did not know comrades, acquaintances, society, life, or nature.'" (source: link txt)
"In adolescence, a person often turns out to be unable to engage in normal communication due to being excessively focused on oneself. But the absence of such communication is traumatic, perceived as a tragedy, and causes the adolescent to become even more withdrawn." (source: link txt)
"In the period when a person's identity and worldview are forming, the young individual experiences an acute need to comprehend the changes occurring within, which results in self-isolation." (source: link txt)
"Personal orphanhood. I already mentioned that one of the immediate problems faced by someone who has lost a loved one is the feeling, the sensation of loneliness, of being abandoned by, at times, the only person who mattered to us, who filled all our space, time, and heart." (source: link txt)
"Stripped to poverty, I felt loneliness much more acutely. Hunger makes the time of communication easier and moves the soul towards openness." (source: link txt)
"Loneliness is the beginning of death, therefore one must always strive to communicate with other people. A person separated from others is not an individual but merely an 'individuum.' He does not find himself. He must seek himself not only in God but also in his neighbor. I will never find myself by separating from others." (source: link txt)